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Author Topic: anti-virus  (Read 7731 times)

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gol

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    anti-virus
    « on: October 07, 2010, 07:55:53 AM »
    What is an anti-virus (  Internet security ) you recommend it

    soybean



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    Re: anti-virus
    « Reply #1 on: October 07, 2010, 09:21:48 AM »
    If for personal (non-business) use, I'll suggest avast! Free Antivirus

    JIggens



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      Re: anti-virus
      « Reply #2 on: October 07, 2010, 10:06:30 AM »
      Avast works well and windows defender and Microsoft Security Essentials also work well if for personal use.

      OpenSource



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        Re: anti-virus
        « Reply #3 on: October 07, 2010, 08:51:25 PM »
        I suggest MSE for a free version, Prevx or Dr.Web for paid versions,  and ESET for endpoint security (although the ESET server installation configuration is a B****).

        ErikAlbert



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          Re: anti-virus
          « Reply #4 on: October 07, 2010, 09:40:24 PM »
          I don't recommend any AV-scanner, they all suck and aren't worth the money.
          Here you can make a choice, based on tests and use only a free ADVANCED+ AV-scanner.
          http://www.av-comparatives.org/images/stories/test/ondret/avc_od_aug2010.pdf

          You also need at least 2 x Anti-Spyware-scanners, like Malwarebytes' AntiMalware and SUPERAntiSpyware.
          Keep in mind that AS-scanners have a lower detection rate than AV-scanners.
          If a scanner tells you "No Malware Found", it only means that this scanner didn't detect anything, another scanner might detect malware, that wasn't reported by the previous scanner.
          The message "No Malware Found" works like a drug to make you feel good and sleep better, but doesn't mean your computer is absolutely malware-free.

          If scanners were so good, why is it still raining MBAM/HJT/OTL/GMER/DDS/...-logs in this forum and many other computer-forums worldwide ?? Scanners aren't smart either, that's why they report false positives, which make scanners dangerous to use, especially for less-knowledgeable users, the majority of users.
          If you want a superclean computer, you have to do alot better than the classical security suite, which sucks anyway  :(


          « Last Edit: October 07, 2010, 10:29:23 PM by ErikAlbert »
          ErikAlbert

          soybean



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          Re: anti-virus
          « Reply #5 on: October 07, 2010, 10:29:00 PM »
          I don't recommend any AV-scanner ...
          That's bad advice.  Enough said.

          ErikAlbert



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            Re: anti-virus
            « Reply #6 on: October 07, 2010, 10:54:46 PM »
            That's bad advice.  Enough said.
            You need them, because you don't have anything else. I clean my computer during each reboot in 2 minuts without using scanners, cleaning software and registry software.
            It works already 5 years and I have beaten the very best scanners so far, they don't detect anything, not even a tracking cookie, except false positives.
            You want my logs to prove I'm infected ? I take the challenge. I can't read them anyway, better you than me. :)

            « Last Edit: October 07, 2010, 11:21:36 PM by ErikAlbert »
            ErikAlbert

            BC_Programmer


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            Re: anti-virus
            « Reply #7 on: October 08, 2010, 01:11:21 AM »
            You need them, because you don't have anything else. I clean my computer during each reboot in 2 minuts without using scanners, cleaning software and registry software.
            It works already 5 years and I have beaten the very best scanners so far, they don't detect anything, not even a tracking cookie, except false positives.
            You want my logs to prove I'm infected ? I take the challenge. I can't read them anyway, better you than me. :)

            Nobody said you were infected. How exactly do you clean "during each reboot"? you know that using a feather duster on the case during the time the machine is rebooting isn't a form of malware cleaning, I hope.

            I don't use an AV scanner either (at least, not a background/automated scanner, those are annoying); but I'm not naive enough (at least, not anymore) to think that all infections can be cured with regedit in 2 minutes. Sure, you can remove pesky autorun's; but what about kernel mode rootkits that hook functions? Do you even know where to look in the registry for  that?
            I was trying to dereference Null Pointers before it was cool.

            ErikAlbert



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              Re: anti-virus
              « Reply #8 on: October 08, 2010, 04:04:11 AM »
              I'm not going to explain how I remove malware. Nobody believes me anyway, they don't understand my way of thinking. What else can you expect from users who don't know anything but scanners and don't believe in anything else. The security world is ruled by scanners, if somebody doesn't use scanners, he is considered as insane and not welcome. He belongs at the stake, like in the dark ages. I was recently banned from a dutch forum, because I was a troll to them.

              Do you even know where to look in the registry for  that?
              No, I don't know where to look, I don't even see the difference between a good and bad object, they all look the same to me. That is one of my big problems, I don't recognize any bad object and certainly not registries, even normal registries are chinese to me. Another big problem is, where to find malware, they can be anywhere on partition-C.
              Nevertheless I found a new method, to locate malware without knowing where it is and remove it safely without even recognizing it like scanners do and without false positives. Just a matter of logical and analytical thinking.
              Explain this to a scanner-freak and he doesn't believe you and it's so simple. Simplicity is always brilliant. :)
              « Last Edit: October 08, 2010, 04:34:11 AM by ErikAlbert »
              ErikAlbert

              Allan

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              Re: anti-virus
              « Reply #9 on: October 08, 2010, 05:54:01 AM »
              I'm not going to explain how I remove malware. Nobody believes me anyway, they don't understand my way of thinking. I was recently banned from a dutch forum, because I was a troll to them.

              Nevertheless I found a new method, to locate malware without knowing where it is and remove it safely without even recognizing it like scanners do and without false positives.
              Well, for the rest of the world - please ignore this genius. Everyone should protect his system with a top notch anti virus utility and regular scanning with a top anti-malware utility (ie, MalwareBytes).

              BC_Programmer


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              Re: anti-virus
              « Reply #10 on: October 08, 2010, 07:27:34 AM »
              I'm not going to explain how I remove malware. Nobody believes me anyway, they don't understand my way of thinking. What else can you expect from users who don't know anything but scanners and don't believe in anything else. The security world is ruled by scanners, if somebody doesn't use scanners, he is considered as insane and not welcome. He belongs at the stake, like in the dark ages. I was recently banned from a dutch forum, because I was a troll to them.
              No, I don't know where to look, I don't even see the difference between a good and bad object, they all look the same to me. That is one of my big problems, I don't recognize any bad object and certainly not registries, even normal registries are chinese to me. Another big problem is, where to find malware, they can be anywhere on partition-C.
              Nevertheless I found a new method, to locate malware without knowing where it is and remove it safely without even recognizing it like scanners do and without false positives. Just a matter of logical and analytical thinking.
              Explain this to a scanner-freak and he doesn't believe you and it's so simple. Simplicity is always brilliant. :)

              That's what you said, but this is what I read:

              Quote
              I'm not going to yippity yap about how I remove bad things, the perfect perfects and the techie scanner types have it wrong, boo perfect perfects, they don't understand the importance of my method. What else can you expect from techie scanner types and perfect perfects? Nothing, they just yippity yap about scanners. Security is ruled by scanner techies and perfect perfects. But do they let in the smart people like myself? No, I get banned from all the techie scanner forums when I show them how to jam a noodle and fix their malware issues. I was recently banned from a dutch forum. They couldn't take the truth. I love my method.

              I don't know how to identify malware to remove, but I can remove it using my new method, it just takes logical thinking, boo techie scanner types. Boo perfect perfects.

              Maybe you can get your method build into a program, like SSDS by spectateswamp Hard to say what the techie scanner types might do. Time for a showdown.
              I was trying to dereference Null Pointers before it was cool.

              ErikAlbert



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                Re: anti-virus
                « Reply #11 on: October 08, 2010, 01:59:07 PM »
                I'm not going to yippity yap about how I remove bad things, the perfect perfects and the techie scanner types have it wrong, boo perfect perfects, they don't understand the importance of my method. What else can you expect from techie scanner types and perfect perfects? Nothing, they just yippity yap about scanners. Security is ruled by scanner techies and perfect perfects. But do they let in the smart people like myself? No, I get banned from all the techie scanner forums when I show them how to jam a noodle and fix their malware issues. I was recently banned from a dutch forum. They couldn't take the truth. I love my method.

                I don't know how to identify malware to remove, but I can remove it using my new method, it just takes logical thinking, boo techie scanner types. Boo perfect perfects.
                I certainly love the method of forums too, which goes like this :
                Did you run your AV-scanner ? Yes, it didn't help.
                Did you run MBAM ? Yes, it didn't help.
                Did you run SUPERAntiSpyware ? Yes, it didn't help.
                Did you run ........... ? Yes, it didn't help.
                OK. Give me your HJT/OTL/GMER/DDS/whatever-logs and wait ...
                OK. Do this, this, that, that and also this and that and give me your HJT/OTL/GMER/DDS/...-logs again just to be sure it's fixed.
                OK. Your computer is clean again. Bye bye, until the next infection. Next malware-victim please and sorry for waiting.

                This is really a fantastic method and keeps everybody busy for hours or even days and it's very productive :
                from clean computer to clean computer. WOW, that's amazing, getting back what you had in the first place. ::)

                I don't even love my method, it's still not good enough because every software sucks, including mine.
                I'm waiting ... for a sensational improvement, meanwhile I'm looking forward to the next election of "Miss Scanner". What a comedy. Pffft.  ::)

                ErikAlbert

                soybean



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                Re: anti-virus
                « Reply #12 on: October 08, 2010, 02:15:02 PM »
                ErikAlbert, you criticize the method of forums but you have yet to explain your method.  If you think you have a better method, then explain it.  Otherwise, you're not making a positive contribution to this discussion.

                BC_Programmer


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                Re: anti-virus
                « Reply #13 on: October 08, 2010, 02:21:32 PM »
                You all yippity yap yippity yap about your scanner logs and your cleaning methods, but can you touch my method? no, my method is better, plain and simple. time for a showdown. Time for me to dance with my medicine stones. Competing products can't touch my method. Boo to the perfect perfects and their scanners. HJT/DDS/GMER cannot touch my method. Miss Scanner? She doesn't know I dance around my medicine stones, doesn't harm at all, nobody else can jim-jam malware like I can, Nobody. You jim jam your scans and you noodle your hardware, but you just go from clean computer to clean computer. boo to the perfect perfects and their techie scanners. You can get free computers from the landfill. save the earth and all that. government doesn't want you to since it supports the perfect perfects techie scanners techie security. Election time comes soon, who should be voted in? My method, but the perfect perfect techie scanner types don't want that.

                P.S: I'm comparing you to Spectateswamp, BTW, you really are quite similar in spirit.

                Actually, his tool claims to clean malware as well, and that nobody needs a malware scanner if  they use his "desktop search" (which I might point out cannot search for files very well at all). Perhaps you are related?


                I was trying to dereference Null Pointers before it was cool.

                kpac

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                Re: anti-virus
                « Reply #14 on: October 08, 2010, 02:22:12 PM »
                Quote
                I'm not going to explain how I remove malware. Nobody believes me anyway, they don't understand my way of thinking.
                There are very intelligent people who browse these forums, so why not give us your way of thinking.

                OpenSource



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                  Re: anti-virus
                  « Reply #15 on: October 08, 2010, 02:56:48 PM »
                  "I certainly love the method of forums too, which goes like this :
                  Did you run your AV-scanner ? Yes, it didn't help.
                  Did you run MBAM ? Yes, it didn't help.
                  Did you run SUPERAntiSpyware ? Yes, it didn't help.
                  Did you run ........... ? Yes, it didn't help.
                  OK. Give me your HJT/OTL/GMER/DDS/whatever-logs and wait ...
                  OK. Do this, this, that, that and also this and that and give me your HJT/OTL/GMER/DDS/...-logs again just to be sure it's fixed.
                  OK. Your computer is clean again. Bye bye, until the next infection. Next malware-victim please and sorry for waiting.

                  This is really a fantastic method and keeps everybody busy for hours or even days and it's very productive :
                  from clean computer to clean computer. WOW, that's amazing, getting back what you had in the first place.

                  I don't even love my method, it's still not good enough because every software sucks, including mine.
                  I'm waiting ... for a sensational improvement, meanwhile I'm looking forward to the next election of "Miss Scanner". What a comedy. Pffft."


                  ROFL!!!! my thoughts exactly!

                  ErikAlbert



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                    Re: anti-virus
                    « Reply #16 on: October 09, 2010, 12:41:28 AM »
                    ROFL!!!! my thoughts exactly!
                    I'm glad I'm not the only one with the same thoughts. :)

                    I also ditched the very popular CCleaner. CCleaner has so many fans in forums, you can't even say a bad word about it. Nobody seems to know that CCleaner doesn't clean everything.
                    Maybe they don't want to know. Ignoring problems is also a way of solving problems. LOL.
                    Again I had to find a new method to replace CCleaner and make my system SUPERclean without any superfluous object of any software in my system.

                    Registry cleaners suck also and are even dangerous to use and they don't restore the original contents of the remaining registries either. They even kill innocent registries and CCleaner does that too.
                    Again I had to find a new method to replace registry cleaners and do it much better, safer and restore the original contents of the remaining registries in Windows Registry at the same time without needing additional Windows Registry backup software.

                    The uninstall program of each software suck even more. There is no software, that is able to uninstall itself completely. There are always leftovers, scattered all over my system. This is really ridiculous, but it's the truth due to sloppy programming of the good guys.
                    Again I had to find a new method to uninstall temporarily installed software without a trace.

                    I do nothing but finding better solutions to solve problems caused by the good guys and the bad guys.
                    Each time I look at a programmer, I see troubles and problems ::)
                    « Last Edit: October 09, 2010, 01:42:21 AM by ErikAlbert »
                    ErikAlbert

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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #17 on: October 09, 2010, 08:10:47 AM »
                      I am also using Avast latest free version.
                      Trying to don't waste my time.  :)

                      soybean



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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #18 on: October 09, 2010, 08:27:10 AM »
                      Again I had to find a new method to replace CCleaner and make my system SUPERclean without any superfluous object of any software in my system.
                      I do nothing but finding better solutions to solve problems caused by the good guys and the bad guys.
                      Each time I look at a programmer, I see troubles and problems ::)
                      Without an explanation of your "better solutions", your comments amount to nothing.

                      BC_Programmer


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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #19 on: October 09, 2010, 09:00:09 AM »
                      I also ditched the very popular CCleaner. CCleaner has so many fans in forums, you can't even say a bad word about it.
                      Plenty of people have done just  that in this forum; it's really more opinion. Personally I just see it as an enhanced Disk cleanup utility, like the one included with windows. This is sensible given that is exactly what it is intended to be (well, aside from the silly registry cleaner it includes).

                      Quote
                      Nobody seems to know that CCleaner doesn't clean everything.
                      Um... you aren't suggesting you use it to try to clean malware, I hope? I've always thought it was only used to clean up temp files and extra fluff that is lying around.
                      Quote
                      Maybe they don't want to know. Ignoring problems is also a way of solving problems. LOL.
                      Some extra used disk space generally isn't a problem.

                      Quote
                      Again I had to find a new method to replace CCleaner and make my system SUPERclean without any superfluous object of any software in my system.
                      Um... alright. Sounds like somebody might be a bit obsessive compulsive here.

                      Quote
                      Registry cleaners suck also and are even dangerous to use and they don't restore the original contents of the remaining registries either. They even kill innocent registries and CCleaner does that too.
                      Do a search on this forum. You'll find plenty of threads discussing registry cleaners, most of the regulars here pretty well agree they are more useless then an Anus on a vampire. There are a few holdouts who insist they see improvements, though.

                      Quote
                      Again I had to find a new method to replace registry cleaners and do it much better, safer and restore the original contents of the remaining registries in Windows Registry at the same time without needing additional Windows Registry backup software.
                      Not sure what you are saying here... are you saying you found a more effective way to corrupt the registry? Because Registry cleaners are really only good for doing that. (small claims could be made in favour of ccleaners which is "safer" then most. It's still wholly unnecessary though.)
                      Quote
                      The uninstall program of each software suck even more. There is no software, that is able to uninstall itself completely.
                      Depends on the application. Usually, all that remains are a few registry entries (sometimes more, if they forget to clean them- harmless) and maybe a few configuration files. Unless you want to hide the fact that you installed a program at all or feel that getting back that extra 2KB of disk space is worth it it's not really that big of a deal. Although some programs leave quite a lot behind; depends on the program. Usually all that's left behind is an uninstaller; it's difficult for the uninstaller to delete itself. The better uninstallers set a flag so the system deletes them at the next boot, which is usually the best they can do. (I think there was a way for a program to delete itself, but it required some crazy voodoo and only worked on 9x).

                      Quote
                      This is really ridiculous, but it's the truth due to sloppy programming of the good guys.
                      Again I had to find a new method to uninstall temporarily installed software without a trace.
                      Most program uninstallers are not created by the same people who made the program. It's usually a third party utility. Really they just need to choose a better installer/uninstaller. Personally I've found "Advanced Installer" (which creates installers and uninstallers) to work quite well; everything appears to be removed properly. Of course a lot of different installers/uninstallers are available, WISE, Nullsoft, etc.

                      Either way, the methods used today are still a lot more "user-friendly" then the way things were done with DOS. Ever tried installing, say, QuickBasic? Or Turbo Pascal 5.5? And they didn't even have uninstallers, you just deltree'd their folder. Of course then you would often have BGI files left in your DOS directory, because apparently TP decides that's where they belong. Although Borland Delphi 2008 seems to uninstall fine. Of course if it would finish installing for me that would be quite nice as well, heh.

                      Quote
                      Each time I look at a programmer, I see troubles and problems ::)
                      instead of complaining, become one, and show them how it's done.
                      I look forward to seeing your code prominently featured on ThedailyWTF's front page. Best of luck.
                      I was trying to dereference Null Pointers before it was cool.

                      patio

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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #20 on: October 09, 2010, 09:10:04 AM »
                      Quote
                      He belongs at the stake, like in the dark ages. I was recently banned from a dutch forum, because I was a troll to them.

                      This comes as no suprise...
                      " Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist should have his head examined. "

                      BC_Programmer


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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #21 on: October 09, 2010, 10:02:47 AM »
                      This comes as no suprise...

                      Well DUH! the dutch are well known for banning obvious geniuses! Clearly it is all of us techie scanner types and perfect perfects who are at fault, the world over! His concepts and methodology are  better then anything in existence, but we refuse to see the truth! OH! THE HUMANITY OF IT ALL! Why can't the rest of the human race see the genius that sits before them! Why must they reject his breakthrough ideas?

                      My guess would be that it's because he doesn't tell anybody what his breakthrough ideas are, and refuses to disclose his methods. This sort of brings into the question the possibly specious nature of it all; does he really have a method? probably not. I think he really is just some kind of troll. After all, he purposely confused AV scanner with CCleaner and registry cleaners and essentially put words in our mouth through implication.

                      Actually, I can pretty well guarantee he won't get banned from TDWTF. There are a few people with insane ideas that they keep around for entertainment. Maybe he and SpectateSwamp (WHAT! you've never heard of him? He's FAMOUS!) and create ASDSRSS, AlbertSwamp Desktop search and revolutionary Scanning System, which of course has the following features:

                      - Installs cleanly, without causing any problems, ever, on any of a million different possible PC configurations. Because testing a million configurations is certainly possible.

                      - Doesn't leave any files behind. Swampies hate when they lose control their hoard, you see.

                      Now, it may seem that I'm being premature; but seriously, this was a post about spectateswamp: (not by me, unfortunately, and a lot of it has some inside references about his... err.. "habits", which are of course not shared by Erik.)

                      Quote
                      SS: "This is the best bridge ever. I am so amazed at what it can do."

                      Us: "Dude, first of all, it crosses a swamp. Why didn't you just build a landbridge? Second of all, at the very end of the bridge the road just ends, what's the point?"

                      SS: "It's incomplete I know, but that's where you come in. I need you to finish the road. It's amazing what this bridge can do."

                      Us: "It's made of plasterboard, though. It's just going to soak up in the swamp and in just a few hours it will be soggy."

                      SS: "You need to buy my "WR" compound which resists water and prevents leaking."

                      Us: "But that makes it hard to maintain. If you had just used stone, treated wood, or steel, you wouldn't need this compound... why is it called "WR" anyway?"

                      SS: "It's 'WR' for water recall because it recalls the water. Give it a try. You'll be surprised."

                      Us: "Why not call it-- oh, nevermind. That's besides the point. Why don't you tell us why you didn't use steel?"

                      SS: "You perfect-perfects need to use steel for your projects because it makes you feel important. My plaster is simple, and everyone can understand it. My grandmother makes papermache crafts, so even she can use it."

                      Us: "They don't need to understand truss design to cross a bridge! That's for the engineers to figure out!"

                      SS: "Oh by the way, I added a drawbridge to the bridge. You just need to stomp your feet 6 times to get it up. I just love this bridge."

                      Us: "But who is going to go under the bridge in a swamp?! That's completely useless!"

                      SS: "I also added an option to pivot the bridge to a random location. Oh man you are going to love random-random."

                      Us: "Random random... what?! WHAT IS THE POINT?!?"

                      SS: "People won't always know where the bridge will take them. It's exciting. Oh how I love this bridge. It can be used anywhere. Anywhere."

                      Us: "You didn't answer my first question. Why do people need to understand steel? I mean, there's no friggen way this bridge could ever cross even a small river. It only somewhat works here because it's in a shallow swamp. If you wanted to put it over the Mississippi River or the San Francisco bay where it would actually be of use, there's no way this bridge could last 5 minutes."

                      SS: "Yip yap yip yap. You are all talk and no do. Let's do a showdown."

                      Us: "Okay, my grandfather helped build the Golden Gate bridge, which handles 500,000 cars a day and has not seen a single structural failure in its long history. Beat that."

                      SS: "I added some pivot points to the bridge so it can be even more random. Random-random is going to cure cancer some day. Oh this bridge is so great."

                      Us: "FOCUS, SPECTATE! We're talking about the showdown."

                      SS: "The bridge can now be moved up and down the length of the swamp so you don't have to begin and end at the same place every time. Other perfect-perfects claim you need to always begin and end at the same point that is boring. My bridge is better because of that. When your Golden Gate special yip yappy perfect-perfect fancy bridge can sprout legs and connect San Francisco to San Jose, then you can talk."

                      Us: "There's no body of water separating San Francisco with San Jose! And even if there was, you just build a new bridge. What if some people want to get to Marin County and the other people want to go to San Jose?"

                      SS: "You perfect-perfects overcomplicate everything. Only my swamp bridge can do what your bridges could never do. I do love this bridge."

                      Us: "You lose the showdown. The golden gate does much more than your stupid little bridge does."

                      SS: "I went to a painting forum to tell people how I paint my bridge. First I have to drain the swamp and then paint everything and then fill the swamp back. Those yippie yappies don't know what they're talking about. They banned me in 30 minutes. Boo to them. Boo"

                      Us: "They banned you because your solution was ridiculous. Draining the swamp? Really? Again, you'd have to drain the Pacific Ocean and the San Francisco Bay in order to do that to the Golden Gate. Besides, you don't paint under water. That's just stupid."

                      SS: "I wonder if you can build a bridge to San Jose with the same simplicity as my bridge."

                      Us: "THERE IS NO BRIDGE TO SAN JOSE. Perhaps you're talking about Oakland? Perhaps I could build an overpass over US-101 on the way to San Jose, but your bridge wouldn't even survive that. Face it: Your bridge does you just fine because only you are using it... but for the mass public, it is useless to them. Your bridge can't withstand a Big Wheel much less a tractor trailer."

                      SS: "I showed the bridge to some of my golfing buddies. They were able to play golf on the bridge because there was a hole I need to patch on it which doubled as a golf hole. It was JUST the right size. Oh the possibilities with this bridge are endless."

                      Us: "Are you sure they weren't mocking your bridge by playing golf on it? Why is there a hole in the bridge? I thought you said this was the best bridge in the world"

                      SS: "Little holes and other things are no match for the random-random and shifting this bridge does. Wait until the public really sees the bridge. It will knock the socks off of the Golden Gate and the Brooklyn Bridge. I bet they are shivering in their boots now. Boo to the perfect-perfect engineers who have to overcomplicate. Booo. This bridge is good. Maybe too good."

                      Us: "Little holes are just what safety inspectors look for. They'll never even approve your bridge if it has holes. The Brooklyn Bridge is a technical marvel if you look at when it was created. In fact, it was created in the 19th century and it's still far greater in architecture than your dinky little piece of crap.

                      SS: "The Brooklyn Bridge is useless if I want to go to New Jersey. All you are doing is yapping about how marvelous the bridge is when it doesn't do half the things it should do, like take me across the Hudson. Oh my bridge could do it all."

                      Us: "Then you take the GW or the Holland Tunnel. The Brooklyn Bridge doesn't move because even if it was an easy feat, people would be pissed that they have to wait for the bridge if it's on the Hudson when they want to cross the East River. Face it: YOUR BRIDGE IS POINTLESS TO EVERYONE EXCEPT YOU"

                      SS: "Come to Alberta. I'm doing SS-training in the swamp shack. I'll make a convert out of you just like I did the golfers. Now they're using the bridge everywhere. Brooklyn Bridge can't touch this bridge. Not even the floating Seattle bridge. While I was moving my bridge north up the swamp, I noticed some dino skins. They look amazing. If I didn't have the random-random moving option on the bridge I would have never found them. Oh, this bridge could save so many people. Maybe too many."

                      Us: "THAT DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE YOU RETARD."

                      SS: "I'm waiting for that showdown. I am going to school you perfect-perfects."

                      Us: "We did a showdown. You lost. Game over."

                      SS: "My bridge now has a random-random golf option. Holes form in the bridge just as you start playing. The golf swampies love it. Give it a try."
                      Now, there are far too many things here that can be applied to both. "my method works better then the rest of yours" etc etc. pretty much "I go against the entire industry because my way is better" seems to  be the theme.

                      I really think Spectate's Program can be improved, with the masterful guidance of a certain entrepreneurs as-of-yet-untold and highly secret methods. Obviously they are secret because they could destroy the world with the sheer power and obvious logic they contain, not because they don't exist and are a whimsical fiction. The combination of spectateswamps SUPER AWESOME programming skill (his ability to write in deprecated, 12 year old languages is unmatched), and ErikAlberts ability to exploit that skill with a complete disregard for morals is what makes them a powerful duo. See, he could get spectate to write a PERFECT scanner program that uses his (again, highly top secret, to the point where he is being hunted down by dutch agents) top secret methods (which of course nobody understands but him, clearly, this is because of his far higher IQ, and we should not be ashamed to admit that he is far smarter, despite not actually proving that these methods really exist, but only making oblique references and implied comparisons (generally that his methods are better, he had to overcome certain difficulties, etc). Spectateswamp can stick a noodle and jam out a new program with scanner abilities, and perhaps throw in a little random random scanning, where it scans random files as well. They will become famous and make millions of dollars, invest in a complex of swampshacks and spread the methodology around. Or, well, probably not, it being top-secret and requiring a quadruple digit IQ. Us Techie scanner types will have to suffer with our dismally smaller brain capacity. Really, I wonder sometimes how we can even be bothered to live, knowing that we can never ever compare to the accomplishments of the great ErikAlbert, and his top-secret methods that he refuses to disclose. Every night I will pray to the holy ErikAlbert and hope that he will bestow upon us unclean masses a tidbit- even of the smallest size, of his immeasurably vast wisdom, in the hopes that one day, our brazen and uneducated minds may attempt to wrap around a nugget of his holy wisdom, only to clearly fail. "Do not worry, my children" he will say, "you cannot yet understand my methods, nobody understands them, but perhaps one day, you will all know the truth" And we will bow our heads, knowing we dissapointed him.

                      Also, Bears.



                      I was trying to dereference Null Pointers before it was cool.

                      moro

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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #22 on: October 09, 2010, 02:07:36 PM »
                      I found a way to use sea water as fuel

                      CBMatt

                      • Mod & Malware Specialist


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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #23 on: October 11, 2010, 02:38:45 AM »
                      ErikAlbert is obviously a troll who either doesn't know anything about anti-malware or knows quite a bit and is pretending not to.  Either way, 98% of what he's saying is complete bull.  I suggest not trying to reason with such a person.
                      Quote
                      An undefined problem has an infinite number of solutions.
                      —Robert A. Humphrey

                      quaxo



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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #24 on: October 11, 2010, 04:53:46 AM »
                      Can we keep this going long enough for me to get some popcorn and a beer?

                      reddevilggg



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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #25 on: October 11, 2010, 05:41:30 AM »

                      My money is on BC_Programmer.   ;)
                      11 cheers for binary !

                      Allan

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                      Re: anti-virus
                      « Reply #26 on: October 11, 2010, 05:44:56 AM »
                      Okay. Time to shut down this nonsense.