I'm guessing upgrading to xp is not an option, nor is chucking AOL out the door, both my recommendation.
ME was nothing more than a profit booster for MS, its probably their worst offering ever (IMO), very thin-shelled, the ONE version of windows that has the LEAST amount of experts on, heck i remember when it came out i went backwards to 98-or-forwards to win2k pretty quick.
AOL is not known in the industry (unless you only ask them) as having bulletproof applications. I've personally experienced endless problems with their software.
Being an AOL user, I'm guessing your stuck with their "protection" as well. Again, anything but bullet-proof.
I'd suggest going to the mighty AOL for support on this-after all, its occurrence, as you imply, is directly related to their own application launch. AOL has a long, long, long, long, long history of problems working alongside Internet explorer. If this TRULY is no longer the case, they should have a quick resolution for you.
IF they don't, please reconsider "chucking it"